The Breeze litter system (and strawberry smoothies)

My female human has been checking out the Breeze litter system at Target for a couple of months now, intrigued by its promise of odor control and no tracking. She gets really upset when she's walking around barefoot and feels litter underneath. It really sets her off. So a few weeks ago, we all started getting "transitioned" to the Breeze, which is essentially a two level thing. These non-absorbent pellets let our liquid go down into the bottom level where a piddle-pad picks it up and keeps it from smelling. The solid stuff stays on top in the pellets just like litter. I guess the final changeover is happening this week. Up till now she's kept some litter boxes around in case one of us refuses to use the Breeze. But now we have four Breezes hanging around, and the female is officially telling us she's getting rid of the litter tomorrow, so we'd better enjoy it while we can.

I am having a good time playing around in it. She tells me that when I was a kitten I didn't know how to use the litter box yet and I just played around and felt the litter between my paws and scratched in it. She tells me I was very cute. Whatever.

So we're all a little weirded out by this Breeze thing, but it seems to be ok. If it keeps the human from going around with a little dustbrush and pan all the time, cleaning up my beautiful artistic litter creations, then I'll be ok with it.
--
I have discovered my new favorite treat - strawberry smoothies! Oh, they are yummy. My human made one the other day with strawberries, ice, milk and a little bit of sugar and banana. I drank all the leftover in the blender container thing as it was sitting in the sink. She didn't know, and kept wondering what happened, but then as it turned out, some of it got stuck on my face, so it gave the whole thing away, which made me mad. Anyway, I'm a big fan of blenders and smoothies.

A break from my normal complaints

I was going to complain about my new litter system today (and people don't think that cats live adventurous lives!) but my human heard a podcast from NPR that made her cry, and convinced me to share it with you. I would never admit to crying over a silly cat story, but I did get some allergic thing going on when I heard it, and some non-tears which I had to wipe away with my paw.

Listen and think what you will about it. My human hugged us all pretty tightly after hearing it, so if you have something furry around, you might want to have it close by. But then again, my human gets weepy over everything. You should have seen her during last week's inauguration.

Hibernating

I'm a bit gloomy this time of year. The Holidays are over, which means that I'm not going to be getting any leftover turkey for a while, it's still cold and really windy, which is a little bit scary, and it's all just time to go into hibernation. Here I am all tucked up and warm and looking dreamy and sleepy (attention Anna Wintour: I'm still available for photo shoots - imagine me all nicely tucked up in a luxury silk blanket, and not this Target flannel thing).

I have decided to reclaim the bed. I used to lay on it all the time, but then all the other cats came, and it was all confusion in terms of what territory belonged to whom. But there's no reason why I can't have the bed with the nice window, too. I shouldn't have to stay up in the attic all the time. True, it's really warm up there, and there's a giant kitty hotel with like 10 cubicles stacked on top of each other, but nothing compares to the nice warm bed. Additionally, the humans let me sleep with them alone most nights now. They started closing the bedroom door because the kittens drove them nuts wanting to play all the time, so at bedtime they always clear out all the other cats and let me stay in with them for some quality Princess Bonding Time. It's nice. I always get a good eight hours, and I get to cuddle with them in their sleep, when they won't know or remember, so I won't lose my reputation for being moody.

The quiet after the storm

This is me in chillout mode. And man, do I need it. The past few days have been kitty-crazy. I don't know what living in these mountains has done to my humans. Somebody put something in their water or something because all of a sudden they're all about saving the dang cats this year. First they adopt Tulip and Blossom (I like Tulip but Blossom and I are still working things out), then Twilight and Polly are allowed to come in from outside, and then Polly has her babies. All of a sudden, it's nearly impossible to just stretch out on the bed anymore.

But this week really took the cake. So there are two outdoor cats that still hang around, right? Fluffy Cat (because he's fluffy) and Mama Cat (who is really a boy, but who the stupid humans used to think was the mama of Polly and Twilight, before they knew anything). Fluffy and Mama fight all the time because they're both boys. For some time the humans have been talking about trapping them and getting them fixed. But they're busy (and lazy). But then the snow came, the female got all sentimental, the male got all "Mr. Fix It" and before you know it, Fluffy is trapped and spraying in the bathroom. They took him to the vet on Friday (after making tons of calls to the humane societies, who have paid for it all), after trapping him on Thursday. He was all kinds of noisy because they kept him in the trap all night, afraid that they wouldn't be able to get him back in if they left him out. He still had room to walk around and lie down, so he was more comfortable than he would have been out in the snow.

He leaves, and I'm all happy because the female started washing the rugs where he peed, and I'm thinking he's gone. But then in the afternoon, he comes back, and is allowed to recuperate in the bathroom from his surgery. Which means I can't lay on the warm dryer, which is my favorite thing in the world to do. And they fed him ham. Did I get ham? I don't think so. Unless I misplaced it. Maybe I misplaced my ham. Hey, have you seen my ham? NO! I didn't THINK so!

Well, he's finally gone now (they released him back outside, where he wanted to go), but the craziness will continue next week because since they are in Cat-Fixing mode, they are getting Mama Cat, too. And he is WILD. It is going to be a NOISY night when he's trapped inside. Their bathroom is gonna STINK. Ain't no amount of febreeze getting the smell outta whatever that boy sits on. Maybe they should put the trap in the bathtub overnight. I'm not gonna tell them that, though. More laundry means more warm dryers for me to sit on.

They keep saying it's because they don't want more kittens in the spring, and how it's the best thing to do for the cats to fix them, and get them tested for FIV so they don't give it to other cats, yada yada. But I think it's just an exercise in torture. I'm enjoying the quiet time now until they trap Mama Cat. It's football time, and I've got me some Cool Ranch Doritos and some Iams food. Life is good. For now.

I can do the festive thing sometimes. Nice hat, don't you think?

My human gave me real chicken tonight. Oh, it was heavenly! I'll wear this hat all day long for real chicken.

The humans are still snowed in, and there is wrapping paper and bows everywhere for me to play with. Life is good.

Merry Christmas to all my adoring readers. I'm thinking up some fun schemes for the New Year.

Snowed In

We are all snowed in up in the mountains, so I have finally been able to convince my human to get out my meow-recognition software and let me blog again. Honestly, she's been so lazy. And so many excuses. Holidays, visitors, blah blah. Really, it was an obsession with a video game that has kept her from letting me blog to you, my loyal readers.

So, it's Christmas time. I am hoping to get a new coat this year. My existing one has gotten a bit scratched up because I've been fighting with Polly. She's the mama of all the babies in the family. She just really gets on my nerves. When she was pregnant back in the spring, she was all b*tchy, hoarding the food and growling at us all. Now she's stressing because she hasn't lost the baby weight, and she's trying to diet, which is making her mean and grumpy. Anyone on a diet is not a nice person, or cat, to be around. And anyway, she's had four kids. I wish she'd just chill out about it. But noooo, she wants to go out and be a party girl. All these boy cats are coming around now, and she sits at the window and flirts with them, and I guess one of them called her chubby the other day, and man, did that set her off. So I have to try to put her in her place, and then she gets me with her nails, and we growl and hiss, and the whole thing gets very unpleasant. It really stresses out the humans, I can tell, but I don't care. They brought her in, they can deal with the stress of me not liking her.

But at least it's warm inside so that's nice. I have a new spot on the top of the dryer in a washbasket that's been there for a while. There's a blanket in it now, and I like to climb in there and no one can see me. It's very nice. Also, during the winter when it's snowy, I appreciate being inside. Twilight was telling me some stories about last winter, when she was outside - before the humans found her - and it was really unpleasant. She sure is grateful for being inside with a regular food supply now, and I try to keep that in mind when I get mad at Polly.

That's the news from here. I'm having a good holiday season. Thanksgiving, especially, provided me with some lovely turkey leftovers, which I very much enjoyed. I'm hoping for more at Christmas next week, too. We'll see....

Don't you wish your kitty was cute like me?

My female human has been listening to the pop stations pretending she's a teenager again, hence the blog title. I see that Tulip has written some most unflattering and completely false things about me. You can't believe anything she says. She is, after all, not the smartest kitten. She's a year old and still chases her tail. I mean, some of us grow up eventually and lose our childish habits.

I am adjusting to life with the kittens. I hissed and hissed a lot when they were first introduced, but I am finding that I can mostly just stay away from them, and play a little bit when I feel like it. I am the only one who keeps them in line, though. Everyone else is all, "oh, they're soooo cute..." and don't notice that they didn't clean their paws after using the litterbox and are dragging solid waste all around my territory. I know they're still young and will figure it out eventually, but I still don't want poop in my nap spot...

I've discovered that the laundry basket in the closet under my female humans' hanging shoe organizer is a most pleasant and cool spot, away from all of the distractions. I come out for food, and occasional exercise and petting, but other than that, I am a kitty in the closet.